Loaves & Fish

Recently, after an especially trying a week, I "narrated" (that sounds better than saying I unloaded, doesn't it?) my woes to my husband. In response to my exasperation, he held out his arms and hugged me. I, of course, was not done narrating as he tried to console me so in a last ditch effort to be the comforter he replied, "You are supposed to be like loaves and fish." At the time I didn't realize the wisdom in his words but since have reflected on them.

Be like loaves and fish...And so I began to think often about this phrase.

The most obvious thing about loaves and fish is that they multiplied. So was my husband asking for more of me? That seemed like an odd request since I had just shared about feeling pulled in so many directions. Then it dawned on me. Yes, the loaves and fish multiplied but not until they were in God's hands! This observation struck me deeply. Here I go again trying to do it all myself when He just wants us to place ourselves in His hands.

We are weak but He is strong.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
This year I have a daunting task ahead of me (at least I feel like I do). I will be educating an elementary, middle, and high school aged child. That is some pretty big gaps. My prayer is that this year my children will continue to grow in the ownership of their education but most importantly that they will grown in the knowledge of their Creator. I am human so I will falter, get side-tracked, and fail...but I am reminded that I will be like "loaves and fish." He will supply all my needs.

Are you ready?

That's a daunting statement....Are you ready? I begin to feel overwhelmed just at the thought. No one is really ready! That is how I felt when the Lord began pressing on me that it was time to start homeschooling. Sure I want to be obedient to His will. Yes I want to serve Him, but are you sure I am ready?

I remember vividly that period of time when the Lord said it was time to homeschool. Three of my four children were in public school and my fourth was just a toddler at the time. He started with Lauryn. She was about to go in to middle school and both my husband and I felt there was something better. Then my husband suggested we look into homeschooling. There was definitely an adjustment but more importantly there was such a tremendous blessing! The following year, we decided that our third child should come home and a year later we did something incredibly radical...We brought our oldest son home during his senior year of high school! Now you would think he would have hated us for doing it and that the whole year was such a catastrophe but that was simply not the case. The Lord provided each and every step of the way. My son was thrilled to come home and I can only thank God for His perfect timing and His provisions.

"They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength..."

That was one of my father's favorite verses and I can see why. I love the part about renewing our strength. As we prepare lessons, taxi children, make meals, do laundry, clean house, serve in church, etc. we become tired. I know I do. I simply run out of fuel. How perfectly He is to provides for us. Write down why you started homeschooling, journal some of your favorite moments, and don't forget to go back and read them. That is an incredible source of renewal and strength for me. Each time I do I am reminded of His hand on our family!

Planting your Child's Garden - Planning

I love how our Lord spoke to us in parables. I love reading through them and truly meditating on His word. As I was reading the parable of the Sower (Matthew 13:3-9), I was struck by how we could apply this to our homeschooling and our children's education.

There is no doubt...I am a planner. I like seeing where I have come from and where we are going. I find that with a plan, we have a better year all around. Now I am the first to admit that things happen and we must make adjustments. Families come to visit; sickness; an opportunity to serve arises. When I have a plan I have the big picture in mind so I can be flexible without feeling tremendous panic. I like planning on two different levels. First, I prayerfully consider the overall goals of each child. This helps me decide on the details.

Once I have that in mind I begin planning how I will accomplish this in a school year. I do this over the summer using an excel spreadsheet. I also take this time to educate and nourish myself. Too often, I think we run on empty and an overtired, stressed mom is not a good teacher. I still must be reminded of this because I can fall into that trap all too easily! I love taking what I have read and making it my own. I love putting my personal stamp on an idea. Creativity like that doesn't come when we are exhausted!

My favorite gardening tools during the planning phase:

a spiral notebook
I carry this around and scribble all kinds of thoughts and notes as they come.

excel
This is where I start mapping out my year

a book on education

ie Charlotte Mason A Philosphy of Education; For the Children's Sake; The Whole-Hearted Child

A Living Book Moment

A while back I read The Velveteen Rabbit to my son. I sat down and wrote it in my journal while it was still fresh in my mind. My hope is that hearing this encourage you.

This past Tuesday night I took the time to read The Velveteen Rabbit to Ben. This night was different because Ben did not fall asleep during the story. Normally, he would gather up his rabbit, crawl into bed with me and be fast asleep before the middle of the story.

I must take a moment and share a little about Ben or this story will lose its impact. He is the last of four children. I tease that our third child, Kaelyn, is our last but God had other plans for our family and our life would not be the same without Ben. Since birth he attached himself to two things…his thumb and a blue, silk stuffed rabbit. Ben is now five and has willingly given up his thumb but rabbit is his “true blue” friend. Rabbit goes everywhere with Ben and of course rabbit shows all the wear and tear of a boy’s love.

With this understanding, you can see why The Velveteen Rabbit would be such an incredible story to read to Ben. This particular night his attention was focused on the boy in the story. He realized right away that he (Ben) was the boy and rabbit was his rabbit. As the story took life in Ben’s imagination, he quickly showed signs of concern for the rabbit, all the while holding his rabbit just a little closer. The boy said he thought his rabbit was a real rabbit and Ben proclaimed that he, too loved his rabbit just as much. We continued reading…the boy grew sick and the rabbit stayed close. Tears welled up in my 5 year olds big, green eyes. “Mommy, why is the boy sick?” he questioned. I assured him we needed finish the story and all would be understood. The boy began to get better. That is when the nanny determined that the velveteen rabbit must be burned in order to keep the boy healthy.

Tearfully my son pleaded, “But he loves his rabbit.” I wrapped my arms tighter around Ben and rabbit and told him that everything would okay. “But Mommy, will the boy ever see his rabbit again?” Ben questioned. “Keep listening Ben. It will all be answered.” I continued to assure him. He hung on to every word longing to hear how the boy would be reunited with his rabbit.

As we finally finished the book, Ben paused and then his little heart burst open. He held his faithful blue friend in his arms, noticing for the first time how much he loved his rabbit. His rabbit is a bluish gray color now. His pink nose is faded and the whiskers are long gone. There is no fluff to his body anymore. And his fluffy white tail is nothing more than a dingy spot on the bottom of his limp body. Ben saw his love and friendship in that old, worn-out bunny. And then through his sobs he pleaded that his bunny should not have to go away and become real. He was heartbroken over the sad truth that these two friends would be changed forever. He was the boy in the story of The Velveteen Rabbit. He understood the bittersweet ending to this classic story.

For me, this is the very definition of a living book. We didn’t have story time Tuesday night, we lived story time instead.

Sunday School...the Charlotte Mason Way

I love spending an afternoon with friends. It just lifts my spirits, encourages me, and usually ends up sparking an idea. This past week, my friend and I got together and (among many things) discussed how to do Sunday School...the Charlotte Mason way. I can not take credit for this, my friend had read a blog where this was already discussed.

A quick sidebar: My husband and I are truly blessed to be able to teach some wonderful 3rd and 4th graders. Among their many wonderful qualities, they also posess a strong background in His Word! As we would teach, the children were reciting Scripture references before we could finish our sentences. This told me that our class needed to go deeper than just an introduction to His Word and my husband and I needed to be able to switch gears a little and go deeper.

This week our lesson was on Jesus being the final authority and God's chosen one. The scripture reference was in Luke when Jesus speaks in the synagogue. So, thanks to Google Image search, I found a beautiful portrait of this scene.

We started our lesson with a picture study. The kids got up out of their chairs, and began leaning over each other anxious to get a good look. It was so exciting! The picture study set the stage. I read through the Scriptures and asked the children to narrate small portions. They were so engaged. It was a wonderful beginning to a new way of thinking.

As we progressed through the lesson, I was reminded of a story, King Canute on the Seashore, from Fifty Famous Stories Retold. This would have been a wonderul way to have started the lesson...maybe next time!!

A Quiet Place

Tonight I am sitting outside on my deck listening to the sounds of outdoors. My dog, Izzy, and I are silently enjoying God's creation. As I sit here, taking it all in my mind wanders and time stands still. And then a thought invades my mind...

Why don't I do this more often? The painful answer is that I don't value this moment enough. There are too many other things that get in the way. But each time I sit in this chair, I feel so relaxed. I feel so calm and can actually stop and enjoy all the events of the day.

Recently, we started something new in our house. This quiet reflection time was not only missing from my day but also from my children's day. Where was the time for them to reflect, imagine, or create? We were all getting too wrapped up in our "to-do" lists! So we implemented a "no electronics" time in the house. Every afternoon from 5:30-7:00 we put it all down (yes, even the phone)! As you can imagine the reaction was mixed. This was going to be an adjustment for all of us. However this week, I caught my daughter in her garden weeding and talking with a friend. She was enjoying herself so much that she didn't even notice that it was past 7:00. I hope we will be able to extend this quiet time but for now, I am content to just take baby steps!